Venting – Regular Guy

Choose Your Setting

brian — Sat, 12 Mar 2022 17:10:46 +0000

Generally, I embrace change. I feel like some situations cause me to rise to the challenge and make me a better person.

However, getting a new toaster might not be one of those times.

We needed to make this change. I will 100 percent concede that. But I might have more than a few issues with the adjustment.

First of all, Maria bought a stainless steel toaster. She used a gift card she received for Christmas so I really get no say in this part of the matter.

I just know that I will manage to sully the shiny surface with fingerprints without even touching it. i have that kind of effect on things. She has put up with my general untidiness for more than two decades. Will this be the breaking point?

I exaggerate, but it will cause me stress, especially when I will do my best to clean the thing, but not do it as well as she would.

Beyond the whole “it has to stay shiny” thing (which I support), there is the whole matter of learning just what the number settings mean.

Sure, the manual defines what setting to choose for light, medium or dark, but what standard is the person who wrote those directions using?

We did do a test with a frozen English muffin and determined that it needed about three and a half minutes somewhere between 3.5 and 4.5. But I put toast on 2.5 the next day, and it only toasted for less than 2 minutes, barely reaching “light” status.

This is important stuff, people. So please show us some grace as we navigate this important challenge. Just don’t leave any fingerprints.

Caring by Not Caring

brian — Wed, 09 Mar 2022 19:27:25 +0000

My career as a full-time journalist ended almost 22 years ago. I last wrote something for a newspaper about 7 years ago. My identity is no longer wrapped up in that profession. I haven’t felt that way for a long time. However, I am immensely grateful especially right now for one of the lessons I learned in the decade where newspapers ruled every aspect of my life.

I have an incredible ability to not give a shit about the minutiae around sports because I had to write about the minutia around sports all the time.

Spending so much time as a full-time sports writer made me gain an incredible appreciation for sports on their own. I didn’t need to argue every finer point or take a position on every drama. I learned that I could just sit back and watch a game to appreciate the skills of the people involved and the chaos that can come from any competition.

In the end, I realize that none of it matters. Maybe a few things do, but they only matter to the people involved. That’s why I ask you sports talk radio or punditry because they really are just exercises in useless conversation.

Fast forward to this week when the college wrestling community, especially on Twitter, lost their collective minds over an injustice that some worry will destroy the sport as we know it for all eternity. The crime that will bring about this ruin? Some wrestlers decided to not compete in the final match of their conference tournament instead of risking injury or an embarrassing loss two weeks before the NCAA championship tournament.

Pretty much all of these guys were guaranteed a spot in the national tournament when they decided to take what is known in the sport as a medical forfeit. The extent of their injuries was not always clear, but the rigors of a collegiate wrestling season catch up to everyone by this time of the year.

That is the worst insult grown-ass men watching on television could ever imagine. I could not believe how people lost their minds. Well, I guess I should because as I sit back in my hobby chair of enjoyment, I have seen lots of idiots going crazy over things that matter very little in the scheme of things. But this was beyond the pale.

One guy even traced back to a match in December when one wrestler decided not to compete in a dual meet against another highly ranked opponent. He said that decision was part of a season-long scheme to game the system in order to have a better road to the finals match at the national tournament. Somehow, this kid and his coach knew how every other match in his weight class would end up back in December so he could enact his master plan in March. Diabolical!

These points often come from people who are sad that they never achieved what they wanted to and need to insult other athletes in order to overcome their weaknesses. One of my problems with the wrestling community, like other niche communities I am part of, is the people involved. They can ruin it with their myopia and selfishness.

But I won’t let that get to me. I intend to sit in front of the television watching all three days of the NCAA tournament and loving every second of it because sports, when it comes down to it, are awesome. I can just do without the fans.

Bragging About Nothing

brian — Mon, 16 Mar 2015 13:04:29 +0000

I have to admit, I used to do this. I still might do it on occasion, but I try to avoid this particular annoyance as much as possible these days. Partially because I realize it doesn’t matter, but mostly because I have realized how stupid it sounds.

People have to stop bragging about not doing things.

I’m not talking about the not doing things that I admire, like spending a whole day on your couch in sweats watching TV for no good reason. That is admirable and should be shared with the world. I’m talking about the kind of not doing things that annoying sports business writer Darren Rovell tweeted about over the weekend.

Realize it’s not what majority want to do, but it’s my 8th year of not filling out a bracket. Don’t think I will ever go back.

— Darren Rovell (@darrenrovell) March 15, 2015

This one got me for a couple of reasons. First of all, I love March Madness and fill out brackets like they are going out of style. I have done this forever so the fact that not filling out a bracket is some sort of badge of honor just makes me roll my eyes. Second, it was from Rovell, who is a twit.

But this isn’t just about March Madness brackets. We see it with any cultural phenomenon. People like to brag that they don’t care about the Super Bowl or Super Bowl commercials or the Oscars (I have been guilty of that) or pretty much any sports or pop culture event that brings people together.

I like some of those things and don’t like others, but why should I or anyone else feel compelled to puff our chest out when we aren’t interested in something a lot of other people like? Twitter and Facebook, that’s why.

I love social networks like those, but that’s pretty much the whole reason for this. People who love these events talk about them a lot, and those who are not included feel like they need to join the conversation if only to say they don’t want to join the conversation. It’s the ultimate “look at me move.”

Which is why the ultimate “look at me” guy Darren Rovell was the one that kind of set me over the edge. As I said, I am sure I have done this, usually with the Oscars and Grammys. I think I have learned my lesson. If you want credit for not doing something, you’re probably the kind of guy people don’t want joining them while they enjoy their favorite things. So just shut up.

Settle Down

brian — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 12:13:49 +0000

Things have already started. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

As we all try to wring the last bit of summer out of the season (even though summer technically goes on for two more weeks, but I’m willing to work with the colloquial definition here), the scourge has crept its way into conversation.

People are complaining about winter. Already.

Not one team had clinched a spot in baseball’s playoffs, and I saw moaning about a possibly harsh winter in my Facebook feed. Never mind that the meteorologists predicting this are probably the same ones who routinely miss snowstorms. That’s an inconvenient fact when snow alarmism is involved.

I have already had one friend tell me that I should just avoid them this winter if I don’t like to hear people complain about the weather. But why would I do that? If I don’t have some friends who complain about the weather, I wouldn’t get the chance to complain about people who complain about the weather.

This is not an indication that I love bad weather. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don’t. The days I can just relax and enjoy the beauty of the snow make for some of the best winter days. The days when I get stuck in the snow on my way home do not.

But I try not to waste my breath talking about how bad things are when it snows for one very simple reason. I can’t change the weather.

My pragmatic side dominates things when this topic comes up. Enough things in this world can raise my blood pressure. I try to keep things that I can’t control off of that list.

Besides, I have the good fortune of working at a place that will close when the weather gets bad, meaning I will never curse bad weather when it gets me a day of sleeping in and watching television. I know not everyone has that luxury and sympathize with those who get angry when they can’t take a day off when school is cancelled for their kids.

But the recent phenomenon didn’t even rise to the level of complaining because a snow storm disrupted your plans for the day. Like I said, the first pumpkin beers were barely on the shelf when this angst started to bubble up.

Complaining about weather that is actually happening is one thing, but complaining about a report that weather in the future might be bad – especially when predicting these kinds of things is horribly unreliable – makes absolutely no sense to me.

We have a chance to buy our Halloween candy seven weeks ahead of time, and some people want to worry because there are reports that think winter might be a bad one? It isn’t even Snuggie weather yet. Can’t we wait to freak out until we see a snowflake or maybe even some falling leaves?

Get outside and pour yourself a summer drink. We have a couple weeks left before fall officially starts. Watch some football. Carve a pumpkin. You have plenty of time before it’s appropriate to complain about snow.

Then I’ll tell you to knock it off and make some hot chocolate. Mother Nature doesn’t care what we think.

Tailgated

brian — Mon, 17 Dec 2012 20:43:00 +0000

On my daily commute, I travel a number of country roads. While the speed limits sit at 40 pretty much the whole way, I prefer this route over any other because I don’t have to deal with backups. I can pretty much predict within a couple of minutes when I will hit certain milestones. This makes getting to and from work much less random than folks who travel on Baltimore’s highways.

This does not mean my ride goes without any problems. The rate of speed generally fluctuates in the low 50s, but you can get stuck behind some slow people or deal with people creeping up behind you. Last Friday, I had both problems from the same person.

The guy in front of me for the first half of the ride wasn’t going that slow, but he was sitting right around the speed limit. I didn’t get road-ragey or anything, but I really hoped I could get in front of him even though not too far ahead of him sat three cars also going slower than I would normally hope.

The ride has very few passing zones, but I had the chance to pass him as I approached one. A stop sign at a significant intersection sat not too far past that so I hoped I could get in front of the first guy and maybe some of the others would turn there, giving me the chance to control my own destiny for the second half of my commute, as it were. So I got to the passing zone, pulled into the other lane and accelerated past the car in front of me. As I looked in my rear-view mirror, I noticed something weird. I hadn’t put much room between the two of us. Then, at the stop sign, I noticed something weird after I stopped.

He gunned it as I entered the intersection (squealing his tires) and almost rear-ended me. I couldn’t see his headlights behind me. Yep, the guy who drove just at and even a little below the speed limit for 20-25 minutes was now tailgating me. For a good 10-15 minutes, he kept almost no space between our cars. I only rarely had a chance to get a good view of his headlights behind me because he rode my tail so close. In fact, I didn’t notice when he eventually turned off because he had been so close.

People can get crazy when they drive, but this was one of the scarier situations I had experienced. First off, I never made any gesture or anything toward this guy (or woman – I never got a look). I didn’t flip them off or blow my horn or flash my lights, I merely passed them. Legally. Maybe they thought I revved my engine when I did it and took offense to that, but it’s not the longest passing zone in the world. I needed to act quickly.

But even if they thought I was being too hasty, they totally changed their driving tactics when I passed them. Not only did they go a lot faster, but they drove dangerously close to my car. I admit I was tempted to hit my breaks hard to try and back them off, but they were so close, I worried that would end up working out worse for me.

I felt really stressed as I drove with them behind me and thought that if they had only gone five miles an hour faster, I might not have even considered passing them. Instead, they added 10-15 mph (I admit i was speeding, but nothing out of the ordinary for that road at that time) and tailgated me.

Other than helping me vent, I don’t know my point except that people need to chill out. This all happened the day of the Sandy Hook massacre and, while I’m not even trying to pretend I went through anything really bad, the thought of the guy behind me with a gun did cross my mind. If someone passes you, they are just trying to get moving a little faster. They aren’t challenging you.