We need the greatest minds in America to step up. A great public injustice can be solved using the same kind of forward thinking that put a man on the moon, developed digital cable and made supersizing possible. We don’t have enough gas grills with coolers attached.
I had the same reaction you probably just had. Shock, disappointment, hunger.
Men walk this earth with very few reasons for existing. Cooking meat over an open fire is one of them.
I often think I missed my calling. Writing should be a hobby, not my main profession. The confirmation of that fact came this past week as television networks released their fall schedules. Television needs me in charge of things.
You sometimes hear about the drug problem in entertainment and the schedules clearly reflected the depth of that problem.
I know I have what it takes to replace the people in charge of planning the schedules. I don’t need some fancy degree from film school or an extensive marketing background.
Through diligent research, I have compiled a mental database of what works and what doesn’t. The warm blue glow of the television has instilled me with supernatural powers.
That has to trump the drug-addled brains of today’s executives.
I have taken some chances in my lifetime. I have driven too fast. I once mouthed off to a 305-pound All-American defensive lineman. I even bungee jumped. But nothing compared to the situation I put myself in a couple of weeks ago.
I volunteered at my daughter’s preschool. For two and a half hours, I found myself at the mercy of 14 4- and 5-year-olds.
Bridget could not wait. She had waited all year for me to find a time that fit into my schedule. I actually could have done it earlier in the year, but just didn’t take the time.
Maria had actually volunteered several times already this year. After each time, she said the same thing.
“I can’t wait until you have your turn.”
When the news broke that a group had formed to try and put a slots casino in Gettysburg, I knew I couldn’t sit idly by. I had to make my voice heard. I had to stand up for what I think is right. I had to join the cause.
I had to do everything in my power to make the plan become a reality.
I have a pretty good life. I really can’t complain about much, but I will anyway. We have a nice house. We don’t have to scrimp and save for food or other basic needs. We get to take nice, but not extravagant, vacations. But things could be so much better.
I blame my wife. Well, not her personally, but her generosity and kind heart. They’re bringing me down.
I don’t always trust people to do the right thing. If people could make the right decisions, we wouldn’t know about Ty Pennington, Britney Spears or Fitness Made Simple” by John Basedow. I feel a heavy burden because this is one of those times where I know people won’t do the right thing. I can already see the evidence.
“Fever Pitch” will be a huge hit at the box office. We can’t let that happen.
They say that England and America are two countries separated by a common language. Apparently that’s true because they don’t understand the old adage that size doesn’t matter. Kentucky Fried Chicken has had a commercial banned in Britain because government officials say the ad misled people about the size of a chicken sandwich.
You are supposed to be reading a column about Easter, but my computer is jealous. At least that’s the only explanation I came come up with why my laptop died the other day.
I wrote while I ate lunch at work and everything seemed fine. An hour later, I popped open the lid of my two-year-old workhorse so I could listen to some of the music I had stored on there.
I will spend hours upon hours Friday night looking over documents. I will pore over reams of documents searching for the perfect solution to my problems. Taxes? Nope. It’s time for my fantasy baseball draft.
This is serious business. Sure, there is money at stake, but I’m not as worried about that as I am about undoing the past two years.
I love sleep. Nothing feels better than curling up in a warm bed and drifting off. But something has changed about sleep as I get older. I generally wake up four or five times a night. I glance at the clock, figure out how much longer I have until I need to wake up, then fall right back asleep. I get a lot of sleep, but it is broken into smaller segments.
I probably should be more worried about my sleeping habits, but I don’t feel overly tired so I just let it slide. I actually should be mad because I have never had sleeping problems in the past.