Me and My Hamloaf
When my wife told me we had dinner plans with friends on a Saturday night, I didn’t flinch. In fact, I cheered the development because I like to get out…
Hair-Raising Idea
A mixture of dread and confusion washed over me as I looked at my reflection in the mirror. I knew I had come to a crossroads in my life.
As usual, I had gone far too long without a haircut. This happens to me all the time so I don’t know why I felt this way.
When I procrastinate on a haircut, things get out of control. My hair does not get longer. It just gets bigger.
Because of that, I have a lot of problems keeping it under control. I do my best, but sometimes I just have to throw my hands up and accept that I will look a little like Doc Brown I “Back to the Future.”
That’s how I felt as I looked in the mirror that morning. I has mostly tamed the top part, but just could not get the sides to cooperate. At the worst stages, it looks like I have a pair of rams’ horns. Yes, it’s as attractive as it sounds.
Then something in the medicine cabinet caught my eye. Once in a while, I help with my daughter’s hair. I know that in order to prevent frizzing, I use a small dollop from one of the tubes in the cabinet.
Change in TV Comedy?
The good news is that it looks like I will continue watching my favorite shows like "Community," "30 Rock," "Parks and Recreation," and "Cougar Town." At least that's the way…
Getting Closer
Sometimes, a milestone comes and goes with very little notice. That’s what happened a couple of weeks ago when we passed the 100 days mark before the beginning of the Olympic Games this summer.
I saw a brief mention of this news on Twitter or Facebook, but just went about my business. A few days later, I started to realize I should have paid more attention.
One hundred days until I can pretty much fill 24 hours with sports, both popular and obscure. Of course, I can kind of pull that off now with all the cable channels and online options available, but that’s not as much fun as the Olympics.
The Great Hamloaf Rebellion
Due to circumstances out of my control, I will be attending a meal at a friend's house this weekend where the main course will be hamloaf. To say I'm not…
Jumping for Joy
Hollywood has a way of wearing us down. Their current tactic combines a heavy dose of sequels and re-makes. Sometimes, I think they don't want us to go to the…
Just Enjoy the Games
Sports seem so simple. You watch a game and cheer for one team or the other to win. Or sometimes you root for one to lose. Or you just watch…
Crisis Averted
I had a very scary moment the other day. In fact, for a few hours, I had to deal with an intense feeling of dread.
Lying on the couch in the early morning as I am wont to do, I noticed something funny on the television set. I had made my way downstairs at some point in the night so ESPN could help solve my insomnia.
As I started to stir, I noticed something funny about the screen. The highlights from the previous night’s basketball and hockey games had given way to a few squiggly green lines.
I rubbed my eyes, trying to stave off the inevitable panic. Once I got my bearings, I managed to confirm my worst fears. The cable box had died.
Trouble Making Connections
As I sit down to write this column, something doesn’t feel quite right. I have started to have bouts of heartburn which drive me crazy. I know I shouldn’t eat certain things at certain times, but can’t help myself.
So I try and take it easy the next morning with a nagging pain in my gut. Getting old stinks.
The good thing is that I know it will go away. I know I can modify my habits. I know I will feel better soon. I wish I could say the same for my mental faculties.
I haven’t become more forgetful or started to deal with bouts of confusion. I still make it home safely at the end of the day. The problem is that, once I make it home, my daughter may want to play a game. That’s the part which makes me start to feel really bad about myself.
Usually she just wants to play “Sorry!” This is a family favorite which has spawned some epic battles over the years, but no real bad blood. Sometimes she chooses “Life” or “Battleship,” both of which pass the time and really just come down to luck.
But lately she has started to choose an older game which has really made me question my worth as a father, a husband and a contributing member of the community.
Bridget likes to challenge me to games of “Connect Four.”
A Close Shave
Groucho Marx once quipped that he wouldn’t join any club which would have him as a member. Sometimes I feel that way. Who would want my brand of insanity and self-doubt?
But recently, I found a group that not only seemed to fit my personality, but, by some miracle, they also wanted me.
I am talking about the Dollar Shave Club. This decision will change my life.