Stop the Subtitles

Against my better judgment, I turned on TLC the other night. You know, the channel which takes the worst part of American society and glorifies it through reality television.

But the old “even a blind squirrel finds an acorn” adage certainly rang true as I sat down to watch the exploits of five Amish folks headed to the big city in “Breaking Amish.” Then we sat rapt as episode after episode of the show chronicling the lives of the conjoined Hensel twins.

I could not help myself even if I can’t stand what the channel has come to stand for. The little binge doesn’t change my belief that TLC is responsible for most of the bad things in this world. That isn’t 100 percent tied to the Honey Boo Boo show, but the true evil of TLC is represented in that program.

They really need to stop using subtitles when people are speaking English.

I have read about this phenomenon taking place on Honey Boo Boo, but figured it was restricted to interpreting their particular southern drawl. Then I found it appearing to help us interpret what the Amish kids were saying. That’s when I lost it.

They may think we’re dumb enough to watch the shows they create, but why do they think we’re too dumb to understand what people are saying on those shows?

I have absolutely nothing against conveniences which make life easier. Just last week, I saw a news report on a machine which shoots popcorn one piece at a time into your mouth. Loved it. I also saw projections about the widespread use of automated cars by about 2040 that made me want to eat healthier just so I can experience that.

But I cannot stand by and let television stations use subtitltes for shows which only feature our native language.

Sure, the people in these shows may occasionally mumble or scenes may take place in crowded and noisy locations. They script a ton of these unscripted shows, but can’t control everything.

There has to be a better way to let people understand what the participants in these shows are saying. We have come a long way technologically. Let’s put our energy into developing better sound editing technology instead of using English subtitles for conversations which take place in English.

As the reality television genre grew more and more disturbing, I heard critics say that only an on-screen death would put an end to the madness. Producers have shown a modicum of responsibility to avoid this fate. Why can’t they apply some of that responsibility when they are faced with the possibility of using subtitles in this manner?

Unfortunately, this just adds another layer to my complicated relationship with television. I love that it can bring some interesting stuff into my life like the many, many questions which my wife and I tossed back and forth as we watched the show about the 22-year-old conjoined twins. But it also makes me question whether society has gone down an unredeemable path toward stupidity.

They might have hidden the answer somewhere in one of the shows I watched, but I couldn’t understand what the people were saying.

Author: brian

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