I like to make a big deal out of life’s minor inconveniences. That’s part of my schtick, and I usually have my tongue planted firmly in my cheek as I make my rants.
But I have found one thing that I truly think we need to overcome before we can further evolve as a nation, a global community, even a species.
We really need to learn how to properly walk in groups.
We only have a finite space to operate, whether we’re on a sidewalk, a boardwalk, along the road or on a nature trail. If we find ourselves in these situations at the same time as other people, we have to use common sense and (gasp) courtesy.
For instance, the boardwalk at Bethany Beach where I vacation can only hold about three people across at any one time. Some areas can accommodate more people, but the bulk of the .38 mile structure (they have it measured out because people like to use it for exercise in the mornings) can only accommodate three-wide traffic.
So why do people think they can walk four across in the morning without having to move for those coming in the other direction or people walking a little bit faster in the same direction – an important consideration since the odds are great that any group which travels four across will only walk at a pace which we can generously call moseying.
Now I know you’re on vacation, and you don’t need to rush, but the rest of us are on vacation as well. Maybe we want to rush, or walk fast for exercise or jog. We shouldn’t have to all move at the pace dictated by the largest and slowest group.
I’m not saying these folks have to give up their right to enjoy the peaceful calm of the boardwalk in the morning, but they have to follow a few rules.
First of all, the larger group has to yield to oncoming traffic. Keep an eye on the traffic ahead and move before the person jogging has to slow down to get out of the way. This goes double if you are in a group with a stroller, and you are not operating the child-carrying device. You have a greater responsibility in this position to remain aware of your surroundings.
Secondly, take a few seconds every once in a while to glance over your shoulder and see if anyone moving faster might need some room to pass. You may find this to be inconvenient as you discuss what might happen on “The Bachelor” this week – in my mind, the people who cause problems walking love this insipid show – but you’re merely showing that other people exist at the same time as you.
Lastly, walk straight and at a consistent pace. Nothing messes up the communal structure of walking more than weavers and stragglers. Until we get tools to read your mind as you decide to list a little to the left and then some to the right or stop because you want to tell someone behind you something, you need to try and think of the others around you.
Either that or don’t give me a dirty look after I walk right into your back or roll my eyes as I try to guess which direction you’ll go in next.
We’re all in this together, folks. Once we get this walking thing down, we can move onto bigger issues. Like why no one should watch “The Bachelor.”